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link 18.04.2005 11:18 |
Subject: Off: Have an easy Monday, everyone :) Возможно, текстик уже с "бородой" - но мне попался только на этих выходных. Надеюсь, поднимет настроение...The Dictionary: what hi-tech salespeople say and what they mean by it New: Different color from previous design. All new: Parts not interchangable with previous design. Unmatched: Almost as good as the competition. Designed simplicity: Manufacturer's cost cut to the bone. Foolproof operation: No provision for adjustments. Advanced design: The advertising agency doesn't understand it. Field-tested: Manufacturer lacks test equipment. High accuracy: Unit on which all parts fit. Direct sales only: Factory had big argument with distributor. Years of development: We finally got one that works. Revolutionary: It's different from our competitors. Breakthrough: We finally figured out a way to sell it. Improved: Didn't work the first time. Futuristic: No other reason why it looks the way it does. Distinctive: A different shape and color than the others. Re-designed: Previous faults corrected, we hope. Hand-crafted: Assembly machines operated without gloves on. Performance proven: Will operate through the warranty period. Meets all standards: Ours, not yours. Broadcast quality: Gives a picture and produces noise. High reliability: We made it work long enough to ship it. SMPTE bus compatible: When completed, will be shipped by Greyhound. New generation: Old design failed, maybe this one will work. MIL-SPEC components: We got a good deal at a government auction. Customer service across the country: You can return it from most airports. Unprecedented performance: Nothing we ever had before worked this way. Built to precision tolerances: We finally got it to fit together. Microprocessor controlled: Does things we can't explain. Latest aerospace technology: One of our techs was laid off by Boeing. |
Музыкальные новости: Небывалым тиражом разошёлся дебютный диск группы "CD-RW" с альбомом "700 Mb". |
Встречаются два мужика у Биг-Бена: - Вот тайм из ит? - Твенти вотчес - Сач мач? - Фо хум хау - МГИМО эндед? (гордо)- Аскед... |
И вновь посыпались цитаты из "Касабланки"... :) |
Dedushka Gyrga: "I feel that iz the beginning of a longlasting friendship!" :) |
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